So, I've been migrating my company's computers to Windows Vista, in compliance with some officer somewhere who wants to have a good review.

In this process I have had the unfortunate displeasure of meeting and spending extended periods of time with some rather... unappealing members of "this man's army" But this particular example, we'll call her Sergeant First Class Andrews, Dining Facility Manager, Camp Stanley; really tickled my ribs.

First off, when I went to do her computer, I had to wait for a month before it was convinient for her to let me do it, and was generally agitated that the whole process would take the 3 hours that I expected. When I told her she could just drop it off after CoB, she adamantly refused sighting that she needed that computer there 24/7... okay...

Down to the meat and potatos. I back up the usual files on her computer, due to generally draconian policies for data storage, there aren't too many places you can put data on our computers which makes my job easier, but as always I try to cover all bases. I asked her if she stored files anywhere else on the computer, she replies that all her data was already backed up. Irked that she made me be non-productive, I set about to re-imaging her laptop. an hour later, I finished and she was good to go.

No sooner do I get back to my office, she calls me and says her emails are gone. I think it's just Outlook being a toolbag, so I tell her to restart it. Still gone. Data file management says all her email archives are in place, and she's connected to the exchange... so... what Emails? Apparently she had made an email archive in the "temp" folder with ALL her emails she wanted to keep. I told her she should have told me there was something important there, because the temp folder is otherwise useless temporary files and such that windows keeps because it's stupid and is therefor not a target of any back up I do.

"I need those emails, they are mission critical."
"This is why I told you to tell me about anything you keep outside of the usual folders, especially mission critical files. The drive has been formatted, there's nothing I can do."
"What does that mean?"
"Well, that's what it means, those files are gone, bye-bye, not coming back, see ya later alligator."
"That's unacceptable, I don't care how, but you need to get those emails back."
"They're gone sergeant, and short of a 20,000 dollar process that might not even work, they aren't coming back."
"Well, then you'll just have to get your supervisor... and get someone who knows what they're doing over here to fix it."

At this point, I am a little miffed, so I tell her that that's not going to happen, that I'm sorry her emails are gone, but it isn't my fault and there's nothing I can do about it. And hang up the phone.

I haven't heard the end of it yet.

She comes halfway across post, storms into my office, and DEMANDS that I drop what I'm doing and fix her computer, or get a-hold of someone who can. I politely tell her that her coming down to my office doesn't change anything. there's nothing that can be done. She walks out... and then comes back in... dear god won't this crazy person go away?

"You know, the arms room door is open."
"Excuse me, Sergeant?"
"I bet, if I went in there, grabbed a rifle and put it to your head, you could fix it..."
"What?"
"You heard me."
"Sergeant... You do realize what you just said could have you stripped of rank and thrown in jail for the rest of your life, if not put to death? Right?"
"Just saying... Think about it."

WHAT... THE... *****!?

wow talk about stupidity at the max and with rank and access to weapons.

WOW, about halfway, even maybe three quarters of the way through, I'm thinking "I can totally relate!"


The last bit though... you've got me beat :O

so, isn't "Dining Facility Manager" just fancy talk for camp cook? what kind of mission critical stuff would really be on her computer?

or maybe I'm wrong, and those emails said where the alien craft from Roswell are located... i guess we'll never know

She's actually like the head cook, but yeah. Basically. I can't think of anything mission critical that would be only on her computer.

She also managed to flood her office last weekend. And then screamed at me for not having her computers, which got wet and are ruined, back up the next day. It seems she forgot that the last time we ordered computers it took almost a year for us to get them. Totally unreasonable... and I thought Martha was bad... Just kidding Martha, you're still the worst.